CE54R: USELESS THOUGHT OF THE DAY XIX: Fear & Loathing in N.O. (It's a... nice day to... start again)

Originally posted November 1st, 2005 at 11:40PM

As some of you know, I went New Orleans this weekend to attend a wedding. It was the wedding of Angela and Brian. Yes, Brian Taylor, my best friend. Perhaps not everybody (the three or four of you who still read my blogs) is thrilled to hear about this, but at least there's some cool pics. Fuck, to tell you the truth, I wasn't very thrilled myself when I heard that I had to go to a wedding in some plantation in the middle of nowhere. Soon I discovered a very pleasant surprise awaited.

Most of you think I left Sunday. I was supposed to drive with Neal there, but at the very last minute Neal decided to go the next day by plane, and he offered to pay for my ticket, so even when it was going to be a very interesting journey a lá Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas, I was happy to accept. I didn't tell anyone about my change of plans and decided to clean my place so I didn't have to do it after the event. Not only I cleaned my place, but I also got a call from New York telling me I had to finish this music I'm doing for a TV station over there, so I worked my ass and when I checked the time it was 6:00AM on the day of Halloween. Our plane left at 8:30AM, and when Neal called me and told me he didn't sleep either cause he was working as well, I knew what would follow: madness. I'm not getting into details here, but from the time I started freaking out, to the moment we got there was pretty close to the movie mentioned before. OK, let me summarize it for the three of you: freak out, tried about all my pants on, packed the essentials (my leather jacket, a tie, my camera, and my cellphone), went to pick Neal up, waited, drove dangerously to the airport, got on the plane, fell asleep for an hour, got out the plane, stand in line to rent a car, Neal fall asleep standing up, rented the car, car's battery is dead, got a better car, confusion while driving in the city, stop by Popeye's, rednecks making fun of us, ate a lot, got in the gas station, got chocolate, coffee, and cookies, stomach ache, the feeling we were lost surrounded by cult members, got there, rock n' roll.

So we get there around 2:00 or 3:00PM. By that time I've been awake for 26 or 27 hours. I didn't pack any clothes because I was one of the groom's men and Brian got a suit for me. Actually, I didn’t pack anything because I didn’t have time, but what the fuck. Due to the lack of sleep I was spacing out, but there was still a lot of work to do before the wedding, so we helped a bit, and around 4PM I decided to try the suit on. He got it right on! This is the moment when our cameras began to take the pictures.

28 hours without sleep and still looking sharp, cool!

The place where the wedding took place was in this beautiful mansion called the Hauma's House, and just by walking around it (cause we parked on the opposite side, really far away from we were supposed to) made me feel a little better about the whole thing. The wedding was at 5PM, and like I said before, I was one of the groom's men, but I've never been one before and I was spacing out, so I was a little confused about what I was supposed to do (fuck, I'm so glad I didn't have to be the reverend, cause he actually asked me if I wanted to be), so I just followed the others and tried to look confident and pretty. I think I at least looked pretty.

I've been to 3 or 4 weddings in my life, including one on Halloween, but none of them have left an impression before. This one did. It was so awesome, and I know it wasn't just because I was spacing out and thinking about the Little Prince that I say this. I was touched. Everything was perfect, even the air I was breathing. I was so happy; proud and happy for him, but a little worried for myself. Brian is a different man now, I mean, he's the same, but very different deep down inside. You'd have to know him as well as I do to be able to tell, but I know. He's come a long way, and I'm so proud of him. He couldn't have found a better match than Angela: she really rocks. I don't really want to spend this blog writing adjectives to describe her cause I could go on and on, so let's leave it at that. She rocks!!!

So let's present them now:

So, one thing I noticed about their wedding vows was that if you add music to them it could have been a Bon Jovi song. I mentioned this to Brian after the ceremony, and Angela, who was very close, overheard what I said and gave me a thump-up and said: "cool!, yeah!". I'd forgotten she liked the music from those glorious days, and like I said, she rocks. I actually think that everybody secretly loves the cheese and I don't think there's anything wrong with it. You guys need to accept the cheese in your lives. All of you all need the cheese once in a while, and there's nothing wrong with enjoying 'I'll Be There For You' or 'Never Say Goodbye'. Deny it all you want, I know you love it. I'll be there when you get married to remind you how Bon Jovi your vows were, just wait and see.

After the ceremony there were a lot of activities that involved the groom's men so I had to manage doing all these things while trying to look natural. Taking pictures, slow dancing with a stranger, and cheering. I had a glass of Champaign and felt I was about to pass out. The rest of the evening I was artificially awake. The food was great but I was too full from Popeyes and the chocolate, so I had strawberries and grapes.

Neal thought there was something odd about the way Brian looked, so I'm going to use the magic of Photoshop to see if you guys see the same thing:

About 10:30PM Brian started talking with big words, and every time someone mentioned the wedding was great he would reply with something about Warsaw, or with some obscure historical event. He was drunk. He managed to stay on foot, although, with every minute, he looked more and more like an acrobat walking on the rope. When I mentioned to him the little detail that we didn't have a place to stay, and that I was too broke to pay for anything anyways, he put his hand inside his jacket and took all the money that people had given him out and gave it to me. I gave it to Angela later on, of course, hehe, what a fucker! Oh! by the way, the motherfuckers are going to Thailand for their honeymoon! Fuckers! I've always been like the default third wheel for Brian and whoever he was with when we used to hang out, so they need to take me! Plus, over there prostitutes are cheap, so I'm sure I can get a nice young lady for myself, hahahaha.

After most people left the party, Neal and I were faced by our little dilemma. Our plane left at 1PM, but we didn't have a place to stay, so we had three options:

1. Sleep in the car
2. Stay awake until 5:00AM and try to catch the earliest flight
3. Drive back

While Brian sang With or Without You (and many other songs) to Angela, we were trying to decide what to do. As crazy as it sounds we chose to drive back, but just minutes before we were going to get in the car the food attacked Neal and he ran into the bathroom. I would not see him until next morning.

When Angela and Brian came back, Angela and I were left with an incoherent/stumbling groom and a trip-mate who would not come out of the bathroom. The decision was to spend the night with the newlyweds! I grabbed the air mattress, went backstage, and turned all those damn lights on, cause it was cold and the lights were warm. The next morning I was told there was actually a thermostat. I think I caught a cold, hahaha.

I woke up the next morning and saw Neal sleeping on a chair. We took the guys to the airport and then got on the plane an hour after them. Now back to Houston, back to this, back to reality. Unfortunately, there's no fairy tales waiting for me here. However, I have and answer and an action for everything, and I just discovered to they sound very cool together:

Fuck it,
Let's keep rockin'!